I can't keep track of all my new responsibilities.
I would really appreciate it if we could all adhere to the following schedule:
Monday: Disenfranchise some Black people.
Tuesday: Go to Taco Trucks and hassle Mexicans.
Wednesday: Monitor the bathrooms in public schools.
Thursday: Uninsure Sick People.
Friday: Go to the MiniMart and scare Muslims.
Saturday: Get some exercise and topple Jewish gravestones.
Sunday is reserved for Church.
You don't have to shame your own identity group, you will be targeted that day instead.
And don't forget to Blame the Media and Nasty Women every single day.
Thank you for your cooperation.
