I'm just going to keep this post at the top from now on.
Now that I have pretty much satisfied most of my personal medical obsessions- I am going to turn my gaze on the one I think causes the most problems in the world: Men’s obsession with their dicks.
It’s pathological. It has destroyed civilized society.
Here’s my hypothesis: Your penises are never happy because you don’t know how they work. They are mistreated and abused. They become impaired.
First of all, most of them have been chronically infected by germs that live in saliva. Do the math.
P. gingivalis impairs the sensory nerves in the skin. That’s a big problem. Sexual success is dependent on the ability to perceive pressure and vibrations.
It also causes inflammation in the tissues. Which is irritating. Abrasions then allow the germs into blood vessels, and they get less elastic.
It also gets in the ducts and impairs the draining function.
I wouldn't be surprised if it traveled to your spine and gave you all that back pain...
Secondly, you don’t know how to operate them properly. You’re terrible drivers.
Orgasm does not just occur in the genitals. It also drains the glands in the face and throat. You never ever include that in your workout. There are vibration sensors in your nasal sinuses too. You must move your head and neck, you need to stretch your face and tongue. If you synchronize this with your hips, you will be able to drain your cranium and relax completely. Yes it looks stupid, but it’s important.
It’s not a wonder you people are never happy.
Stop blaming women. You’re the ones suffering from Hysterical Suffocation. Y'all should have figured that out a long time ago. Try some curcumin soap and lotion instead. Reduce your inflammation and infectious burden. Fix your nasty teeth, they impair your facial nerves. Clean your mouth and nose before sex too.
And please, stop doing weird anti-masturbation rituals. It’s quite healthy and satisfying if you do it right.
(for the record, I'm pretty sure you're going to want your children to have a vaccine for this...)
